Obituary to my Aunt: Mira Mausi
April 27th, 2021. I wake up with a phone call in Berlin at 4:20am. Whatsapp call from India, to inform me that my Aunt( Mausi in Hindi/Bengali language) had just succumbed to an heart attack related to covid and passed away. She was around 67 years old and lived in Salt Lake, Kolkata.
We were very close as mostly mother’s side relations are. We used to go to her place and spent half of our childhood with them. Many of my vacations were spent with them. In our childhood we did not think of expensive vacations on beach or holiday resort. It was a close family affair. And how much we enjoyed those precious moments when families came together to spend time and we had a lot of sumptuous food cooked by our aunts and mother. That spontaneous flow of love and concern. Houses were large and could hold 8–10 people or more. Days spent together and the moments shared together now stays as memories of the past. Precious memories which would not have been possible without Aunt and mother both being house wives. Those subtle formative years when we knew the value of joint family, when we used to live with our elders (grandparents) and inspite of all the household conflicts we had (which at the time made us realise that things are never perfect in family settings), yet now leaves us with sweet memories.
Aunts and our mother’s are a lost generation. They will never surface again in our lifetime. In the age of working, independent women, when the house becomes just another commodity to be traded for bigger and bigger ones, family has taken a backseat, many a times. We have a house, but not a home. Because if there was a home, we could meet and play together with our relatives. That is a major difference between then and now.
We want material comforts and wealth, not realising that for our children, they need an inclusive environment, where they can not only learn the bookish knowledge, but see how an extended family can co-exist and how enjoyable an experience that is.
As I reflect today about my Aunt (Mira Mausi), only tears of sadness comes, from reflecting upon how much she contributed silently to our lives. Whenever we needed we could drop into her place, take late night flights (as her house was close to airport) and how she used to go out of the way to prepare all sort of nice food for us.
In her later life, she became ill from some kind of neural disease. The stress of maintaining a household single handedly had taken its toll. Continuously she used to serve all and everyone who used to drop into her household. Yes, silently she did everything. Only contributing and never asking for anything. Where else shall we find such sense of sacrifice ? She always came last after serving all.
Her house became her pilgrimage. She served one and all without asking for anything. There is only few moments in my life, when I have shed tears. But one cannot hold it back when one reflects on such a life. There may be thousands of Indian mothers who like her has given their all for the next generation. She is survived by her son and daughter. They certainly will be the recipient of all the good she has done.
In India in strict terms, death is supposed to be a form of freedom of the soul from the body. But that love, compassion and sacrifice a person leaves behind on this earth, cannot be weighed in material returns. It is not possible to give back in return for all one has received. And that is precisely what elevates a human being to more than just a body.
As the fire of COVID is spreading like a wildfire and taking the lives of the elderly generation, we offer our humble prayers and wish our cousins all the support that we can offer them.
This article unfortunately cannot express the many varied experiences that I want to describe for lack of words or ability to express them. But at least hopefully it sheds light on what so many families may be facing in the current times. One generation is being totally wiped out in India by this deadly virus.
To just put into perspective the severity of situation now in India. Total covid cases per day is touching around 2–3M and expected to rise to around 5M.(official figures are 10 times lesser). And if this continues for a month, the number of cases will touch 120M case (4M*30 days). Even if we take 5% as death rate we are staring at a monthly death rate of 6M. This is nothing less than a mass extinction event like a world war, except that could still be controlled but here the enemy is still unknown and dealing deathly blows from which we do not know how to recover.
Let us commemorate the sacrifices they have made for us and hopefully we can reflect some of the glory they have shown and pass it onto the next generation.
